


allowed to want

by sinspiration



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Aftercare, BDSM, Dom/sub, M/M, Multi, Safe Sane and Consensual, Safeword Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-01-15
Packaged: 2018-09-17 13:14:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9326414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinspiration/pseuds/sinspiration
Summary: When Eric pulls him up for air, Kent's only playingI don't deserve even thisover and over in his mind and he rasps out, "apple," before he can talk himself out of it.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A thing I am not sure about! But posting it anyway. 
> 
> Safeword use happens extremely early on; fic is primarily about aftercare.

Kent's barely keeping himself upright, blindfold in place, hands cuffed behind his back, and spreader bar holding his legs wide. Jack's fucking in brutally with his fingers  and Eric's got a hand fisted in his hair, using his mouth. He's strung up between them unable to do anything but cough and choke as Eric moves him, thighs trembling to hold himself up, hold himself still, Jack's free hand digging deep into his hip. He's going to have bruises later.

"Look at you," Eric murmurs, "Desperate for this. Practically begging us to treat you like you deserve." Kent whines high in his throat, which promptly turns to a whimper after a particularly vicious tug to his hair. "You don't get to  _ speak _ ," he says. "You don't get that. Your mouth is for us, remember? To  _ use _ ."

Kent chokes again as Eric pulls him back down, trying to breath through his nose even as Jack pushes him forward, three fingers deep, deep inside him.

"Just a little slut, you hear me? And it's all you're good  _ for _ ." Tears spring to his eyes because Eric's right, it's  _ true _ , he is, he fucking is and he's lucky he's even getting this with them, that they'd deign to use him this way--

Fuck he--

_ Fuck _

_ Fuck _

When Eric pulls him up for air, Kent's only playing  _ I don't deserve even this _ over and over in his mind and he rasps out, "apple," before he can talk himself out of it.

Jack immediately pulls his fingers out, slow and careful, and starts working on the spreader bar while Bitty reaches over to uncuff him. Kent collapses into Bitty's arms with big, wet gasps, but he shakes his head when Bitty tries to remove the blindfold.

"I can't--" he says, "I'm sorry, please, I can't--"  _ I can't look at you right now. _

_ Can't look at you looking at me. _

_ I'm not worth you. _

"Shh, sweetheart, it's okay, you don't have to." Bitty's stroking his hair. "You don't have to, baby. Jack, could you--?"

"I'll be right back," Jack says, because of course he can read Bitty's mind, they're both so good for each other, so good together, what is Kent even  _ doing-- _

He loses time while Bitty whispers endearments, unable to believe them.

"Here," Jack says--later, when did he get back? "Kenny, I'm going to touch you, okay?" Kent whimpers and nods, because he couldn't do things right but he can at least give them what they want now.

"You were so good," Bitty tells him, as Jack runs a warm, wet cloth over Kent's body. "You were so, so good, honey."

Kent hitches a sob. "Apple," he says again, because he thought they were done with the scene, that's what the safeword is  _ for _ , "Apple, apple,  _ apple--"  _ trying to move away, off of Bitty's lap, where he doesn't belong. He tumbles straight into Jack and Kent flails against him, chest heaving.

"Kenny," Jack says, sounding a little... scared? "Kenny, you've got to tell us what need."

"Please don't," Kent begs, "Please don't, I know I'm not, I know I'm not good enough for you, I--" he feels hands cupping his face and he flinches back, but Jack is right there, strong and solid and warm.

"Kent," Bitty says in a voice that books no argument, "You are one of the most wonderful, selfless, amazing people I've ever met. You absolutely deserve this, and we are so, so lucky you let us have it. Have you."

"You're so loved," Jack assures him, "So loved, Kenny." and it's too much, it's too  _ much  _ but they're not done.

"Can you tell us what you need, baby? What do you need from us right now? I know you can tell us. You're so good, you're always so good for us."

"I don't--I don't  _ know, _ I'm sorry--" Please don't leave me

"Don't be sorry, sweetheart," Bitty coaxes, "It's hard sometimes. It's hard asking for what you want. Saying what you need."

"Please Kenny? Please tell us." Jack kisses his neck and Kent shudders against him. "What did we do wrong? How do we fix it?"

"You. You said that's all I'm good for," Kent manages, voice small. "And you're right, it's true, I'm sorry--"

"I will never, never say those words to you again," Bitty says, taking his hands. "Never. I didn't mean them when I said them. I never want to hurt you Kent."

"But I--but I need it sometimes," Kent whispers. They've told him before, that he's allowed to ask. To say what he needs from them. That he isn't a burden.

"Sometimes you do," Bitty says easily. "And that's okay."

"We just want to give you what's best for you," Jack adds. "What you need."

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ruined it."

"You didn't ruin a  _ thing. _ You told us to stop when you needed us to stop. That's exactly what we want. You were perfect, Kent." He feels Bitty brush a lock of hair off of his forehead and he leans into the touch, desperate for it. "Oh honey. Do you want us? Do you want us to hold you? We can do that. Just sit and hold you."

"If that's what you want," Jack says. "Only if it's what you want. It makes us happy to make you happy."

He wants them to hold him. He wants it so much. To feel them all around him, to stroke his hair, tell him he's good.

They're quiet, waiting for him. Jack is holding him loosely, like he's ready to let Kent go if Kent asks. Bitty is still holding his hands, running his thumbs over the backs, soothing.

Kent takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. "I--I want that. Please."

They move and gently move him until they're both sitting against the headboard and Kent is curled up in their laps, head resting on Bitty's leg. Bitty plays with his hair and Jack skims his fingers over Kent's body and it settles him, lets him breathe a little easier. They wouldn't do this if they didn't want him. They wouldn't go this far.

Bitty asks if Kent wants to take the blindfold off and Kent shakes his head. He just wants to--to feel them. That's what he wants right now. Anything else would be too much.

"Okay," Bitty murmurs. "That's okay. Thank you for telling me."

He doesn't know how long they stay like that.

"Kenny," Jack says quietly, after some more time passes, "Kenny, can we show you? Would you like that?"

He manages a nod because he would. He would like that. And they're offering.

They lay him down and worship him, taking their time to pay attention to every part of his body. At some point he starts crying again, but it's out of a relief this time because he can  _ feel _ it, can feel that they care about him.

"We care about you  _ so  _ much," Bitty says, after Kent is able to voice that, when they see his tears and stop to brush them away, to ask for his current word. "So much, Kent. We want to do this for you. Always."

And it's--it's okay. Because Kent's allowed. He wants them. So badly, he wants them.

And he's allowed to have what he wants.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm [justwritins](http://justwritins.tumblr.com/) on tumblr and I'm total cp trash right now. Come say hi!  
> 


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